Happy New Year Friends!

And so it begins!  2022! What a journey the last 2-3 years have been for us all!  We discovered what an actual “collective” problem, a WORLD problem, is for the first time ever really!  Our planet has indeed shrunk 5 sizes as our population has expanded. 

Back in the ’80 we didn’t think days like Covid would happen in “our generation”.  We thought (or I thought) the “end of days” won’t happen in our time.  Movies like the Matrix, Break Out, Legend…they were all just movies.  We had NO idea that our government really IS the “House of Cards” with Kevin Spacey being a manipulative idiot!  

I know some of your hearts are broken as we’ve seen certain demise from the people “in power”.  I know many of you, like us…brace yourself of another year of the “shit show”.  And although I’m on a roll with some deep heavy blogging the last few months, I simply MUST connect and speak of these things when I sit down to write.  

All of us are, will be, and have been affected.  On some level, we can turn off the news, refuse to talk politics, and refuse to “get into it” with family or friends…but there has been some deep heart pain in our human collective.  Ripples that are happening that we have NO idea what the Tsunami will look like after the rise, but I feel that we all have an inner knowing that the tipping point is close at hand.  

So…what do we do?  How do we look at life? What picks us up again?  Well, not trying to toot my own horn, but…MUSIC!  Music picks us up again (or can drown you in a bucket of tears depending on what song you listen to, put the whiskey bottle down!).  But staying positive, listening to positive music and taking in nature and being with those you connect with…these are what get us through our darker days.  

Yes, Covid is on the rise again.  We’ve suffered a topsy-turvy career of cancellations and the restaurant businesses shaky ground.  One thing that stands out, people want and need and hold onto their music.  I’m letting myself have that one.  I’m proud of our plight in this journey.  

I swear if the ship is going down…I will be the one on the Titanic playing until the damn thing capsizes.  It’s just what I’ve come to do and I know it.  I’m not getting rich, I’m getting by…but I feel blessed and rich in Spirit.  

I draw on the knowingness that there is indeed a “grand plan” in all things.  The Universe is innately good, even when people choose not to be.  

There are a million things wrong with the world…over a million things, yet; here we all are.  How do we celebrate who we are, what we have, what we represent out in the world?   How do we lift? Give? Shift? Connect? Teach kindness?  At the end of it all…don’t you think that will be the thing we remember most?  

People we’ve touched?  Who have touched us? Who made us laugh, or cry tears of love?  Our animals that have comforted us or how we’ve comforted them?  Strangers, coming together for a common good?  

There is something beautiful in it all…even the tragedy of it. Reminds me of another Kevin Spacey movie, “American Beauty”, quite poetic!  

Reminds me of “Life is Beautiful”, we DO keep “getting the chances to ‘over-come’,” and yep…sometimes it’s a bitch! 

But I’ve been sitting and watching and feeling every little feeling with myself.  I’ve sat quietly (and sometimes NOT so quietly), and heard my inner voice.  “Appreciate Every Day!”  Even when it’s hard it’s good!  

I have been in such gratitude for each of you also!  Weather you know it or not, and especially this winter, your love, kindness, generosity, support has helped tremendously!  

I am devoted to be a better movie maker this next year.  Ugh!  I just can suck at that spoke of the wheel.  It’s a time thing, but I’m going to do my best.  We can resolute so many things on a brand new calendar.  I remember one year I declared I didn’t want to have ANY goals!  Ha! My goal was having NO GOAL!  I think I pretty much enjoyed myself that year.  I still got things done, but I didn’t pressure myself so much.  

I wish that for you all!  Life is hard enough without making it harder.  I think we are all learning to “put the club down” we occasionally “beat ourselves” with and honor the moment, what feels right, what is integral to ALL aspects of ourselves and consider others in those decision makings.  

I will never give up on the goodness of human kind.  I am a fierce relentless, passionate, underdog, artist!  I believe in the power of love and goodness with all my heart.  I think making a difference for others is part of a value system so entrenched in me, there is no other way for me to be. Yet, let it not be at a cost to ourselves, right?  Is wiser me perhaps, still “building a better boat”?  How to stay in the “sweet spot” and do enough without feeling you need to “do more, be more, have more”.  

So in 2022, I wish for you all, true balance.  Balance of the mind, heart, goals, dreams, aspirations and health!  Whatever your new year’s resolution is, may it be from the heart, and may your yearning be quenched!  

Now, I’m putting a new song out there.  Haven’t really played it out to folks, only in small private gatherings, but for you, my sweet people, I hope you delight in this!  Basically, without “over telling” any meaning to you and allowing you to “get” from the song what you will, I invite you to listen with an open heart.  Sometimes it’s the nature of the “bird” to sing the same old song, and sometimes that song breaths joy into us, and sometimes it breaks our hearts.  This is merely an observation and in some tricky way, like a song always can when you stare at it too long, it can turn into a reflection.  And when that happens, it truly kicks your ass!  My inner song-writer fairy likes to do this to me – so crazy the lessons we learn from our deeper selves!  

Be safe out there, celebrate your NOW time!  Go see, listen, be with someone who inspires you!  And thank YOU all for giving me a platform to try and do those things!  We love you all! 

Nicc, Mo & and Juno (Juney Bug, Bucket of June!)  

Little Bird

By Niccole Blaze  (10-05-21)

V: C, Em, G, C

C: Dm, C, G, C

B: Dm, Am, Em, F#

Oh the south winds are calling

Rising up like a storm

She might make a mess of things

Leave your beautiful heart torn

I don’t care about the weather

Or the state that she’s in

I tell ya this my friend

She’ll be leaving again

She’s gonna fly fly fly

That little bird

She’s gonna catch that wind

And be gone again

She’s gonna fly fly fly

And spread her wings

Don’t let her take your heart

No matter what song she sings

Have yourself some fun

But don’t fall under her spell

When she flies away 

Don’t let it hurt like HELL 

She’s got another bird

Down in her southern nest

She’s going to split her mind

And put her love to the test

She’s gonna fly fly fly

That little bird

She’s gonna catch that wind

And be gone again

She’s gonna fly fly fly

 spread her wings

Don’t let her take your heart

No matter what song she sings

I know there’s a yearning in your heart

I know the learning will play its part

Leaving it up to you to be strong

She’s gonna sing the same old song!

She’s gonna fly fly fly

That little bird

Yeah if she’s got you

It’s more than she deserves

She’s gonna fly fly fly

And spread her wings

Don’t let her take your heart

No matter what song she sings  (Ch X2)

(Altro: )Don’t let her hurt your heart

No matter what song she sings

Don’t let her tear you apart

No matter what song she sings! 

Blazing Blaze!!!

Hello Sweet Friends!

That month went WAYYYY quick! Probably due to the fact that we took a few weeks off and did some traveling. Our last blog was about our trip to Cambria CA, and the big thing this month was having some solo time for each of us and my journey down to Green Valley Arizona. 

I have a sweet friend Rhea, who moved down there last year this time. She is in her 70’s and has been quite a “life-mentor” for me throughout my years. She has been having some health issues and I really wanted to catch up with her and spend some quality time. She is very into the Buddhist philosophy so we did quite a bit of meditation. I was honored to sit in, what I call “Rhea’s Star Ship”, and have all sorts of journeys in my mind! Wow! What a trip! I not only went to Arizona, I experienced some really cool Zen place of the mind! It was quite a treat! 

We did a group meditation outside one day. Arizona is BEAUTIFUL this time of year and Green Valley is located about 30 minutes south of Tucson. This is a 55 and older town, so I was the youngest of everyone in the group.  Something about being in a group of older folks who have all this wisdom and a life mostly behind them and are practicing being in the moment, was super powerful! 

We did a guided meditation for the first 15 minutes and then the next 45 was “quiet”, but it really wasn’t quiet. It was fantastic! First, the lawn mowers, and grass blowers and everything in the WORLD made noise. I found myself going up up up beyond the noise. I was thankful in that moment that I have a bit of a hearing disability and I quieted my thoughts and mind and made space for the noise to simply be there. 

After about 15 minutes of this, I noted that the motor noise drifted away and the BIRDS took over! This was quite fascinating for me as I don’t really get the privilege of HEARING many birds. So with my eyes shut, I’m out in “space” rising ABOVE my thoughts and listening to these beautiful birds singing their songs. Of course my mind would come back from time to time saying, “Wow, I hear that? How close are they?”. They felt like they were INSIDE the circle! The Ravens were calling, having quite a conversation, back and forth, back and forth and it was so cool! There were 2-3 times I SWEAR the raven flew right through our circle! I could actually HEAR its wings! I’ve NEVER heard that before! Maybe with a flock of geese flying super low but I have never heard a single birds wings flap. I don’t know if it was the meditation drawing my senses out further or what, but it was MAGICAL! 

And of course all the others in the group heard it as well and smiles beamed when we all opened our eyes! My trip was an introspective one. A lot of inside travel for me and a chance to “get to know myself” even deeper. This was rare for me. Mo and I are rarely apart. We spend 24/7 together and the cool part is, we like each other enough to do that! Ha ha! But there is something super special about having our own time away from “our person” to reflect on our own self. I am absolutely the WORST at this! Ha ha! I find I “outsource” myself, my energy, my time, my attention to others almost constantly! I have been really looking at this because, I KNOW it’s a factor that can take me away from creating a song and musing along. 

When I go back in time, I note my most loneliest and alone moments in my life produced the most writing. Now, I have many irons in the fire constantly! Lots of booking, admin., practice, shows, streams, logistics, correspondence, music biz stuff…then household stuff, dog, relationships, self-care, work-out, etc. how does “song-writing” become the LAST thing I put my attention to instead of the FIRST thing? So, you can see the inner struggle and my annoyance with myself LOL! I have been quite the PRO at just observing these days! Just WATCHING myself, my choices, the “gravity” of what I am typically drawn to. 

First one must SEE before they can SHIFT! Right? So this winter I’ve made it a practice to NOTICE what and WHY I do the things I do. What am I getting out of each thing I’m doing? What propels me to do that thing? What is my CRAVE? What is my YEARNING? What is YOURS? Have you ever thought about this? I wish I could hear your answers and do feel free to message me if you ever have reactions to my blogs! I absolutely LOVE hearing from you! 

So…there is an “inner BLAZE” going on…ha! And I mean this on MANY levels. There is a fire lit in my heart for one, noticing all the love in my life and this inner journey. And then….there are hot flashes! Oh God, here I go! And I’m not saying that older women in my life have betrayed me! Big Laugh! But what in the absolute fuck?! And men who read this, my apologies but maybe you will find it interesting or at lease amusing. I had NO DAMN IDEA how much menopause would affect me! And plainly…it SUCKS! I am struggling for acceptance of it! I’ve noted NO ONE freaking TALKS about it! So how in the HELL am I supposed to KNOW anything of this crazy stage I’m in! 

We women keep this under wraps and it is an inner HELL for me right now! First of all, I’m sure my brain chemistry is having its field day! I am fortunate I still feel pretty positive, despite the BLOATING and weight gain. I do smell the “cigar smoke” of inner depression however. (I love the way Elizabeth Gilbert draws out in her book Eat Pray Love, the characteristics of depression and loneliness, making the emotions an actual human persona. Depression smokes a cigar so I’m stealing it from her - no plagiarism here…it’s a private page ha ha! Credits go to Gilbert!) 

Those who are in my inner circle have kindly listened to my rant about such things. I am beginning to embrace it, it’s been about a month now and it hits you…I guess near as I can think, like puberty but the other way around! Ha ha!  And I know this is TMI (too much information) but fuck it, I say…it’s some REAL SHIT!  Why DON’T we share about these things?  What is so “personal” about it anyway?  It happens to ALL of us! It’s not like we can control it.  So your body heats up at random times, you feel like you are exploding from inside out! There is a realization that mother-hood is COMPLETELY off the table, and of course, that was my choice and I’m ok with that- but the body is now telling you it’s REALLY not an option.  It’s just such a weird feeling and a reflective time!  How would a child have FIT into our lives?  What kind of mothers “would” we have been?  That chapter is over, unless I wanted to adopt at 54 and that would be crazy for us.  And then ladies, let’s talk about the damn body dismorphia! Holy cow!  It is such a strange feeling to feel “beasty”…you know, like you are NOT going to fit into your FAT pants!  But…you do!  You feel ONE way and you LOOK another!  I’m probably in the best shape of my adult life right now, stronger and leaner than I have ever been, but I feel puffed up – like a puffer fish! What the HELL?! 

A part of it makes me see how hard women are on themselves.  How much emphasis is put on how a woman LOOKS and not the attributes of her soul/spirit.  What a ridiculous lower level world we can live in!?  Nobody cares or pays attention to your Buddha gut more than you – ha!  It’s a trip.  I can completely accept someone else’s belly, arm fat, cellulite and what have you…what about my own?  And WHY are we “built” this way.  Of course in my feminism I blame the American culture and the objectification of women that has been blasted at us all our lives.  

I was ALWAYS that “different” body growing up.  Stout and strong, low to the ground (ha ha…a true “gather” neantdrathal LOL!)  There were never any commercials featuring women that were athletic or buff.  All tall and anorexic; what gives with that shit?  I have a funny, self-deprecating “model” story I will share with you if you are interested sometime – absolutely mortifying yet hilarious, about how I was called in for a bikini shoot on the beaches of NJ back when I was in my early 20’s.  Ahhh gad! Quite a humiliating story but I digress.  

I find it refreshing that my niece is a National Power Lifter and can be proud of that title!  I am wicked proud of her!  Her legs are probably 28” inches around and SOLID muscle and she is beautiful!  Hallelujah that the younger generation is redefining beauty.  But here we are in OUR generation with all this BS.  How do we age gracefully?  And we as so-called “Rock-stars” ha ha…we feel it.  How to feel and stay “sexy” as we grow into our older years?  And why? What the hell is the point?  The point is, we know this world is a bit un-evolved.  It doesn’t look at the Spirit of a person; it looks at the outside cover and you could lose or win a gig based on that first appearance. That is a sad truth of the matter.  So…as I age, I work my ass off to “fit the bill” so to speak.  It’s not just about that for me.  I’ve always been athletic and I enjoy a good workout because it reduces my stress and gives me the illusion that I have some control.  But as a woman, when you are working your ass off and eating as healthy as you can maintain, to see the scale dip upward beyond your control, it is the most defeated feeling.  

I have quipped the “bloat” with some Chinese herbs and essential oils and I am coming into some homeostasis, but wowsa what a journey.  I have also noted that this is a point in a woman’s life where emotionally she asks the question she’s never been allowed to ask (at least in my case) “What about me?”  You know, that question is “illegal” for women! Men get to have that question when they come out of the womb, but women are made to feel shame when they ask that question.  To think of yourself is a “selfish” thing!  Wow!  How in the hell…who set that up?  These awarenesses are priceless and they are happening more and more as I turn inward and observe and grow.  

I have recently been listening to a pod-cast I would love to share with you, particularly the ladies although evolved men could find it interesting.  It’s called, “We Can Do Hard Things” hosted by Glennon Doyle.  I love the topics they cover and the thoughtful ways these ladies discuss these topics.  Check it out if you would like.  I listen to that during my workouts so I get a brain training AND a body workout.  I have found this year, it has been a challenge to make a space just for myself and hour a day somehow.  I know that seems crazy because it looks like Mo and I “have the life” on the outside.  Like all we do is sit back until the next show ha! But it takes the entire week of all the in betweening to put on such a show and deliver the energy.  It’s like serving up a Thanksgiving dinner, there is a lot of preparation that goes into it!  Ya know, and sometimes we cook the damn bird too long and it winds up dry.  We don’t get it right every show but we strive for that.  

I would also like you to know, I have another song in the can that I just wrote recently…so I have 2 for you!  However that being said, I’m sitting on them for a bit longer.  I don’t know why exactly, but that is my feeling.  I like my “little birds” to be with me for a bit.  I get to feed them and make them stronger and put music to them better and then let them fly.  They fly out there to land in the consciousness of others, then they take up space in others minds and become “themselves” and they aren’t really “mine” anymore.  The relationship with my songs become different when they are introduced to others and not kept to myself.  There is a loss and a gain to it all and since I’ve slowed down and am learning to love myself, I’m keeping them for just a bit longer.  I’m enjoying them and relishing in what they have to teach me.  That’s it really.  It’s not to keep them from you but it’s to help me get what I need from them before they go “live” out into the world.  I enjoy that feeling of anticipation and excitement about a new song.  I’m not ready for the bubble to be popped by someone’s opinion of the song.  I hope that makes sense.  

My website link to add new VIP blogs has been breaking down and giving me grief too.  Squarespace has of course upgraded so with that, everything is sideways and harder to post, so things are taking longer and have been more difficult.  I’m thankful for your patience on the content.  Mo and I scanned all the songs we have posted and discovered that we indeed did NOT have “Girl Crush” on the VIP!  How in the hell did we miss this?  I think I banked it and produced it and THOUGHT I posted it, but had not…sooo….enjoy our version of Little BigTown’s “Girl Crush”.  Merry Christmas Dede!!!  I adore this song and love that Mo takes the lead on it!  I love the spin we do with driving the song in a passionate way!  I hope you enjoy! 

We hope you have a beautiful holiday season full of love and light and positivity.  I know there are many things to be in the trenches of life, but I hope you place those things to the side and focus on what brings you joy this season.  I know I share some uncomfortable topics perhaps for some of you, but I also hope you can appreciate the vulnerability for which they are shared.  Thank you for embarking in our journey and for participating in this personal reflection and inner look of “Blaze and Kelly”; mainly “Blaze” right now, ha ha!  All fired up!  LOL!  

Be well friends and thank you for all you contribute to our journey!  

Niccole (Mo & Juno)

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

Open the "Gate"!

Hello Friends!

We arrived back from our trip to Cambria CA this week and what a trip it was!  I attended a song-writers workshop with John Smith’s Tribe and it did NOT disappoint.  Mo and our dear friend Trudy came down to take in the sights, the food, the ocean and help me have a good time! 

 I was in the workshop everyday from 10am-12pm, 4pm-6pm, and sometimes an evening class or jam.  I was pleased with the content of the workshop and the people in the workshop were amazing.  Each one was brilliant and unique as a song-writer.  So many different styles and personalities, it felt like a small sub-family in a way. 

 We had traveled with about 7 of these folks to Ireland in 2019, and we knew a few more from a workshop we attended back in 2009.  It was a coming together, a sharing on a most vulnerable level and a joining of brother-sister hood.  JUST what the “doctor” ordered for me. 

 The first exercise out the gate was writing about your pain.  We spent some time getting our “grievances” written down on paper after listening to an Andy Grammar song, “I wish you pain”.  “Holy Jesus, what a way to start a workshop”, I thought.  As I wrote out my sorrows I thought, “no way will I have to share this”.  I mean, I was a teacher for years and always had the kids keep a journal and write things down, but NEVER expected them to share their writings.  It was a teaching tool as an outlet and it sure beat them punching the lockers and breaking their hands. 

 So we had about 15 minutes of a free write and I spilled out my frustrations, my angers, my fears, my surrenders and it felt good to put down on paper just where I was at.  This part is nothing new to me.  I spend quite a bit of time just free writing.  Normally I am on my computer airing all my dirty laundry onto a document and as I write something typically happens.  I get clearer.  I am uninhibited by another person’s presence or judgments of my words.   I can speak freely and watch the letters form.  I can type faster than I can write AND one could actually READ it!  My handwriting has become like hieroglyphics!  In some ways that is good, if I have a private song, I am the only one that can “de-code” it!  Ha ha!! 

 So I am galloping along, scribbling my life’s hardships down on my yellow legal pad and thinking nothing of it, as I’m CERTAIN this is for our own process.  The group stops writing and then Julie, John’s right-hand gal who always helps John facilitate these things, talks about vulnerability.  She refers to some sayings and a book that Brene’ Brown had written called, “The Power of Vulnerability”.  I was listening, and I have read about 3 of Brene’s books and I THINK I am ok with vulnerability.  I think I lean IN instead of leaning OUT.  I pride myself on doing shit that makes me absolutely uncomfortable. I stretch myself further and I’ve realized just how flexible I can be throughout my years, both physically and mentally. 

 I’ve put a LOT of work into being the person I’ve become, and I don’t say that lightly.  It hasn’t been an easy thing.  There has been no “blade of grass” I have not analyzed in my mind, or have processed.  All my childhood shit has been usurped and looked at, analyzed and put back together again.  I have literally had chapters in my life that have felt like a raw nerve exposed.  Embracing shame, pain, rejection, unrequited love, familial pain, abuses, insubordination, anger, anger, anger (I say that 3 times because anger is my “go to” emotion ha!!!  The ugly one that gets me on a New Jersey rant and the one I’ve learned how to laugh at because most of my anger is absolutely ridiculous!) So Julie started talking about sharing our writing and I felt myself get hot.  I’m like, “Oh shit, really? I don’t know these people like that!”  My body was on red alert.  Kind of like having a hot flash but it’s all self induced stress. 

My agreement to myself before I entered this workshop was to “go for broke”.  Anytime I wanted to “lean out” I “leaned in”! Fuck!  I did NOT want to share my vulnerable sweaty underwear with this group! Even though every one of them is a sweet soul, I sat there and sweat more!

 Julie started to count us off.  I am so familiar with this because I did this as a PE teacher.  1, gets to me and calls me “2”, 3,4,5,6  (there are about 12 of us in the workshop not including the instructors).  My attention is razor sharp as I know where this is going.  “Who’s going to be my partner?”, I’m thinking. 

 “1 *2*!!! 3 4”,  Al!!! I have Al Hass as a partner!  I knew this seconds before the group and AL. All the years of dividing kids up to play a game, the kids would try to organize themselves so they could calculate their champion soccer or flag football team.  But I always saw through the jocks and would fuck them up by counting in 3’s or something that would throw them off.  LOL! 

 So AL looks at me from across the circle and smiles wide.  A huge sigh of relief goes through me.  “Ahhhh…I love AL!  I am safe!” He was a perfect partner and we bonded and had so much of the same shit riding on our shoulders.  I could not have picked a better person to partner up with and he and I got closer and kept tabs on each other throughout the rest of the workshop. 

 Don’t get me wrong.  My life is good!  I feel so privileged to get a go with this music career and have the relationships that I do.  But…we ALL have our demons.  The things we ruminate over or the things that are just unsettling or not quite processed.  And I slid into the “gate” with this vulnerability.  Turning another year older, working this music thing through Covid when people are treating each other terrible, seeing my own physicality get older, realizing I have only so much time to do this, pressing my mind to expand, musically, physically, emotionally etc.  It’s been a journey. 

 The core of this is…it takes a lot of heart churning to bring you the songs that I do!  I don’t have the liberty to sit back and live a life that is only surface.  That was never mine to do! 

 If you read these words, you know…I’m a bit intense.  That can make some uncomfortable.  I kick up other people’s vulnerability by being who I am, but I also give people the absolute FREEDOM to be exactly WHO they are!  But all this comes to say…songs SUCK if they don’t have anything REAL to them!  If they are just a “boop-boop a doo”!  I’m not interested!  The song loses me, I’m not grasped or led to expand, I’m just singing along. Slap stick music can still be entertaining and valid, but I’m not moved.  

 Now obviously there are those lighter tunes that I love, Diggy Dog, 5 star dive-bar, Fat Pants;  I love writing those goofy songs too!  I have a lot of humor and observations.  But to write a song that compels me…to really put my heart out there…I LEAN IN instead of taking the easy way and leaning out…life’s too fucking short! 

Say something worthwhile!  You’ve got the mic, you’ve earned the stage.  Sing a song that MOVES me! Right?  Sometimes believe it or not, depending on the day, the state of mind, HORMONES (ugh God!)…we entertainers can feel completely at a loss.  The magic or the muse may not be firing on all cylinders.  Mo and I are lucky that we can “ping” off each other, especially if the crowd is dead, which is unusual for us. 

 I am lucky to have a partner that knows my mind, how I think, my insecurities and I know hers and can read her face quite well.  We are there to say, “it’s ok to step out!”  and we do this all the time for each other. 

If you were on the spot, center stage…or let’s just say it’s Thanksgiving dinner time and YOU get to make the toast.  Let’s just say the words are not coming to you, you try to say something funny and your people just look at you with a blank stare, clearly NOT picking up what you are putting down.  It can be horrifying!  Not so much in a dinner setting like that, but in a setting full of strangers and fans, it can be a real “oh shit” moment. 

 We LIVE our lives this way.  We take for granted the koospa it takes to even get up on stage and put a guitar around our necks and step up to a contraption that is going to make your voice the loudest of anyone’s in the room!  How fucking frightening!  Every day, each show… oh my!

 Now let’s open your journal, let’s take the very thing you were so scared to share with ANYONE…let’s put it in a song and then get up on stage with a microphone in your face and a piece of wood with strings that you’ve somehow learned to strum in time…and let’s sing to friends, fans and strangers your very deepest fears, hurts, wounds and injuries so that everyone ELSE can feel human!  WTF!?  Crazy right?  Every day…every show…

 Now you know why cover songs can be a real treat for us because we are NOT attached to the initial emotion of the song!  Those all original shows can be a challenge.  But…one I am up for! 

 It’s worth it to me to expose my thoughts and feelings and do it through music.  It’s worth it because I see it show up on people’s faces when they connect with a song.   I see their energy, how it shifts, how we temporarily feel like a “sub-family” at a B&K show.  We ALL have our stories and we all just went for a ride on this tune and songs have a way of meeting you right where you are and spilling your heart out when words don’t fit.  It’s fascinating and I love it! 

 So John Smith’s Tribe is a REAL group of people.  I have a deep respect for each person’s journey.   And in between the classes I was swept away to some of the most amazing places! This was the other side of the trip that I absolutely got my cup filled. 

 We explored Moonstone Beach where the stones were polished by the Sea and looked like jewels.  So mesmerizing and enchanting, we wanted to bag all the little treasures and take them home!  We explored the elephant seals and little town shops!  The girls thought of lovely adventures to do each day and the food!  Oh. My. God!  Such amazing meals were had (which is why I need to add some extra cardio to my workout routine  ha ha ha!  Live a little! Right?) 

 We had a delicious time and enjoyed our moments together.  Staying at the Pine Lodge in Cambria was such a treat as they had a hot tub and heated pool.  We would get up early before class and soak, taking in the humming birds and butterflies that were in migration.  The smells of jasmine in the air and the beautiful trees indigenous to California!  My God I could live there if money were no issue (I would miss our community here in Boise, don’t worry folks).  I love the climate, the ocean air that I was use to from my upbringing in New Jersey, the lightness and adventure of something new each day awakened all my senses and it was magical and dreamy. 

 I am left with many notes to decipher.  A translation of the hieroglyphics, song starts, song concepts, theoretical ideas to move the music, a good shot in the ass to …DO THIS!  I am left inspired, my heart is on fire, much desire - to bring it home and be the best artist I can be.  I am grateful for the chance to do this and for Mo and Trudy for jumping in and making it a great adventure and exploration. 

 I am thankful to have time to reflect, write, and make time for myself.  It’s been so rare to get to do this.  We’ve taken a mini sabbatical from our shows this month.  We have a few at the end of the month but I really wanted to SIT with what I knew I would get out of this workshop.  I really want to investigate the possibilities to reach for the next “rung”.  I feel blessed and honored to walk this special path called, “my life”. 

 You ALL have a special path to walk.  I know inspiration can be hard to find.  Especially in times like these.  Who is lifting you up?  How can you lift YOURSELF up?  How can you “bring it home” – claim your own zest and desire to light your own heart on fire?  What makes your soul sing?  What hits your gas pedal?  What makes you say YES? 

 Just some thought for you as I write this blog.  Feel free to do the first assignment I had and write down all your grievances, demons, deepest fears and anger anger anger, and then….share it – or NOT!  Ha ha!  At least it will be out there and lighten your load! 

 I love all of you!  So much!  And I thank you for passing your eyes upon these words. 

 The download this month will be a favorite song of mine, “Desperado”. I love the story of this song.  I love the melody, the chord progression, the tempo.  It speaks to what I have written here, I hope it speaks to you.  Coming down from our “fences” and opening our “gate”, can be a difficult journey.  But really…what the hell else is there really to DO in this life?  Isn’t that what we came to do? We are so distracted and we get pulled into so many things that aren’t real.  I hope you all find your Queen of Hearts and remember, somebody loves you! 

 Blessings to you all!

Nicci  

 Mo and I at the Elephant Seal Beach

How could I NOT have a great time with these amazing souls???

Sharing a beer with my favorite Trudy!

Trudy is finds herself a rare boat!

Mo's favorite elephant seal

The gang the first night out at a Mexican Restaurant. Left to Right, the lovely Katie (Al’s Wife), the fabulous Al Hass, the talented Lance, the “mightiest” Mo, the dancing Dana, the Johnny Luv and then there is that cartoon character on the right. Heh!

A love sandwich!

Beautiful rocks on Moonstone Beach! Wow! So magnificent!

The whole trip was like a decadent dessert! Which is why I probably need to hit the gym extra the next few weeks! Ha!!! Totally filled my cup!

What are you celebrating?

Well Howdy Folks,

New studio floor!

This is my SECOND attempt at this month’s “Rock-tober” blog.  I had it all ready to go and I threw it in the can.  It was just a fumble.  Well written but I just thought it was too negative. 

I have honestly been spinning a bit recently due to some friends I care about, their pain, heart aches, health issues, mixed in with my own grief from my Dad who passed a year ago this month.  I just didn’t like what we had written when I was editing it.  I didn’t like the song we selected or the performance of that song.  So…we get a “do over”, right?

 Sometimes you just have to do things over again and this is one of those times.  Something about the Earth shifting on its axis with Fall equinox really challenges us with the day light changing and different weather.  My world truly has been a bit “rocked” these days, so I will honor that and give myself some grace.   

 I am happy to say that I have, after all these years, learned to give myself some space and some grace.  It’s only taken me my whole life to figure that out!  Ha!  How about you?  When you are just damn depressed that day, or had a crappy day at work…do you build space for yourself?  Do something nice for yourself?  Throw away the negative self talk “club” or do you perseverate? 

 Fall brings beautiful and glorious, yellows, oranges and reds, and what also comes with it is the inward cycle of reflection.  I most certainly miss my Father indeed!  I most certainly miss the world before Covid!

 But there have been amazing “growth spurts” and things to celebrate. I have a good friend that starts her conversations with me with this question:  “What are you celebrating?”  I love that question! Spins your whole life around to make you look at the good! See what you appreciate!  What are YOU celebrating? 

As we “jam by the fire”!

 I am celebrating a new floor in our studio, and ceiling being completed.  I am celebrating my new battery operated leaf blower (ha ha! True! It’s going to be so much better than dragging that damn cord around! I just bought it today!  Happy birthday to me! LOL!) I am celebrating friends, my love for them, our deep and real conversations.

Morning Coffee with “Jam”!

 I am celebrating this REAL walk I am doing, in relationships, music, and writing.  I am celebrating a very successful season of music and the fact that we have built in some down time this Fall for things that we love;  writing, reflecting, reading, a bit of travel.  I am celebrating that I just wrote a new song TODAY!  Well…it’s almost finished, but I was inspired and moved and I feel like I have my footing on how to go about this season to keep creating.  I am also celebrating going to a song writer’s workshop the end of this month.

Finally squeaking out a song!!!

 I am celebrating Mo and Meghan’s birthdays and for that matter my own trip around the Sun at the end of the month.  I am celebrating this pooch who is resting her head on my foot presently.  I am celebrating getting wiser and not needing to do the things I thought I should to get certain results.  I am celebrating an audience member wanting to bring us to DENMARK next Spring (we’ll see…could come true!) I am celebrating finding a new and better builder for our Van and the possibilities of getting on the road next year!!!

Feeling Alive (Bogus Mt. Sunset)

 I am celebrating love, friendships, opportunity, and new exciting experiences!  I am also celebrating hitting my goal weight and staying on track with my health routines! That’s a biggy!  It’s taken a LONG time to get here!  I am also celebrating every morning with a cup of coffee in our “new studio” – just jamming every morning on electric guitar and I feel like my solos are improving! 

Darwin photo bombs!

 There is a lot to celebrate, if we frame it in that way.  My attempt at my last blog was “missing the mark” of celebration and not what I wished to broad cast. 

Juno are you ready to go to Arizona?

 Bottom line, there is a lot of pain and uncertainty in the world and in our lives.  People are struggling and I am affected by this – it’s just the nature of who I am because I care. 

Sweet Friends Kim & Trudy!

 So I thought I would give you this song…one of my absolute favorite songs.  This may be a cheat because some of you may already have this recording – but I know many of you do not. 

 “Looking Out” by Brandi Carlile with the band at the Sapphire Room! That was a magical night!  This is my sentiments to my friends, Mo and to me:

“I know that darkness pulls on you, but it’s just a part of you. When you’re outside looking in, you belong to someone.  And when you feel like giving in, like it’s the coming of the end, when your heart can break in two…someone loves you!” 

“Darkness” pulling on Robyn!

 Someone loves you!  We do!  Let’s celebrate THAT!!!

 I hope this sets your brain on a “happy train”!  Thank you for tuning in and all your love and support.  Darkness can call on all of us at some point or another.  Never forget how loved you are!  It will make your life right again! 

 Much love!

Niccole and the Mighty Mo plus Juuuunooo!

Let’s keep kicking ass!!!

Looking for the Good!

Mo and Papa! 2014. I love this shot!

Playing the 5 Star Dive Bar at Roseberry!

Hey Folks,

August came in fast and left just as fast. Mo and I have been in a whirl-wind this last month. It’s hard to imagine just last week we played some amazing shows, the Roseberry concert series in Donnelly Idaho, and then for Big Al’s and the next day we were on a plane to rendezvous with family and celebrate my Dad’s life.

We arrived a half hour before the ceremony commenced. Everything was set up beautifully. 4 days prior I could tell I had stressed about it. A minor head-ache and inflamed throat, I was worn out hard and a bit nervous wondering if I had Covid or not. The last thing I wished to do was spread that to my family.

We played a house party for a couple (Nancy and Terry) in McCall. It was a mellow beautiful and small gathering and they let us camp and stay in their little cabin by a stream. That stay saved me! I needed the down time desperately. We’ve been running and traveling a lot this last month, including trips to Stanley and then all the way out to the Gorge in Washington to play and also listen to Brandi Carlile. With the excessive heat and smoke, stress and emotions about Pops wearing on me…my tank was empty.

Fran, Mo, Nicc, Trudy, Kathy and Lynda…ALL VIP members catching some Brandi Carlile at Gorge WA (the guy on the tv is photo bombing! )

Sitting by the stream with our sweet friend Trudy and taking in the deer and nature all around us, I came back to life. I can’t say I remember being that tired in years! We took naps, enjoyed the silence, had thoughtful conversation, ate sushi, emptied our minds and took in that beautiful lake Payette. Just what the doctor ordered.

Trudy Chillin’

Without that time, I don’t think I would have done so well at Dads. It was tough…bittersweet. The sweet part was seeing my family. My brother and sisters were there with their kids and my great nieces and nephew. My friend Timmy and his wife Jenni came too. Timmy was my first partner in music. He and I played all the venues in Sandpoint and North Idaho in the late 90’s. He plays on my debut CD “Despite the Dent’s”. He adds a beautiful 12 string guitar and vocal harmonies. He was instrumental in my life as a beginner and really helped me find my path in music, so encouraging.

The bitter part was being among all that beauty without that beautiful man by our side. Here we all were, gathered on his property, sharing stories and telling Dad jokes, and Dad wasn’t there. Everything he owns is there, his ties are still in his closet. When it got chilly I grabbed one of his down coats, stuck my hands in the pockets and there was a bag dog treats galore! Made me giggle and flooded me with memories.

We slept in his house that night. Just Mo and I. The families had made other arrangements. We were in this big, dark, cold house…without Dads physical presence. Oh, I FELT him there for sure…but I couldn’t hug him and that’s the bummer about death. It completely severs that physical contact. It can appear to be so final…and depending on your faith and how you believe, you never see that person again. Well, my belief is, until it’s your turn to go back to your maker.

I have a theory that we go to the other side and we carry out our lives in a different way. We don’t ever die, our bodies do, but our spirits are eternal. Now, I know this is probably a bit of a morbid blog and it’s entitled “Looking for the Good”, but there is “good” here. Even though it’s painful, I DID see him in the golden hue of the sunset or every time a dragon fly whizzed by. I saw him sitting in his chair, reading the paper, peeking over it saying, “Hey Nick-el, what cha up to today?”

Death is a vale and I don’t believe it’s a permanent thing. Much like the cycles of life, it’s another cycle. There is evidence (enough for me) in nature. We witness the Fall colors as the leaves slough off, back to the earth (or my compost bin) and then bloom in the spring. We wake up to a new sun rise every day. The moon orbits the Earth and the Earth orbits the Sun. There is this circular motion that happens in our Universe and on some level, death is a mere part of the circle.

Sunset at Lake Pend Oreille (Ponderay) Sandpoint Idaho

“Everything that goes comes back again, you can hold on to that string, sometimes the holding is the only thing” (excerpts from “Lena’s Lullaby”). Sometimes the holding, whether it’s who your snuggling with at night, who you hold in your heart dearly whether they are here with us or not…it’s the holding, it’s the remembrance, it’s being able to smile because of the time you had with the person. Tears are just a measurement for how much you loved them. Tears are good. They shed our feelings and fears. They restore our confidence and make us right again. Crying doesn’t hurt, it’s a grand release. Bottling feelings hurts, it represses us and adds confusion, stress and anxiety to our lives. If we can be free to feel, we shed those things that make us feel bottled and trapped. It’s simple really, but…it’s not easy.

To release we need to sit with the feelings. We need to feel the way we feel and cry when it comes up. All too often people get busy. They have all these feelings trapped in the body and in the mind. They run around doing doing doing, never stopping to feel. Looking for release in some other way; friends, work, alcohol or drugs, a to do list a mile long. And then we wonder why we are inflamed, or disenchanted with life, depressed or discontent. There are enough irritants in the world right now for feelings to topple over! “Who has time to cry?” ha ha!!! I cry all the time! Some are happy tears of gratitude and some are of deep sorrow.

One thing that truly allows us to stop and FEEL is music! The very thing we do! It’s a moment of coming together, seeing friends, listening to songs and letting our heart strings play as we listen. Nothing stabs my heart and opens my tear ducts like a song! OMG! Turn on my water works! What a powerful tool! It can bring you up or down! And it’s not terrible to use music in this way. To let it open you up and feel. To allow yourself a release of pain or loss or sorrow. I encourage tears, because they are real, it clears the weeds from our path.

I told a story to Mo, I don’t think I shared it with all of you, so forgive me if you’ve already heard it. It was after Pops passed away. I went for a swim to do laps and clear my mind. It was early morning and I had my suit on and my gear. I put my feet and lower legs in the cool pool. Brrrrr! I looked at the water with anticipation. Knowing I would get use to it in under 10 seconds as soon as I started moving. But to sit there in the chill, I was not looking forward to the shock of the cold water. I thought about my Dad on morphine the last few days of his life. I wondered, was he reticent to “jump”? To leap up out of his body and transition to a new atmosphere?

With that, I took a deep breath and even though my body resisted, I plowed into the cold water and started kicking my feet very hard. I was flying! So free as we float in the water! Weightless! Floating! It was cool but like I knew, I was use to it under 10 seconds and it was invigorating! I thought, this must be what death feels like. You are in a different surrounding with new laws. It’s a transition. One we can fear, one we can embrace. I could have sat with my feet in for another 15 minutes but my goal was to swim.

Beaver Bay, the most southern tip of the lake!

My goal is to live the very best life I can. I know others have a similar goal. How can I be my best self? I walk with that conscientiously all the time. It shows up during the little every day life things. Doing dishes, picking onions from the garden, practicing scales, gazing a a beautiful lake, seeing love in friends eyes. Yes, it hurts that he’s gone but he’s with me. Just as the people you may have lost are STILL with you!

Mega onions! Walla Walla’s and Reds, picked from our garden! I think this made Dad smile!

There is a musician/entertainer that I adore! Her name is PINK! She is dynamic, strong, beautiful, beyond talented! She is a sensation! I put her up there with Cher! A true show girl! If you haven’t seen her latest documentary on Netflix, check it out. It’s called, “All I Know So Far” and I just fell in love with her and this song. There is a line that says, “Even I can’t teach you how to fly…but I can show you how to live, like your life is on the line!!!” I love that line! If your life was on the line, what would you do? How would you be? What would you wish to complete? clean up? embark upon?

I love the truth of this tune! The passion she puts into it and the honestly she shares with her children and to us. She is remarkable and has grown into quite a performer through her years. I am glad there is a PINK on this planet! I don’t have it in me to swing out on a cable to a crowd, so I’m glad SHE gets to do that and we all get to feel through her performance and music! How awesome that the world has PINK!

So ”let the walls crack, cause it let’s the light in”…be strong enough to be vulnerable, “when the storms out and your running in the rain, put your sword down dive right into the pain….” If you are living life, you WILL be drug through some hell times…but you will be eternally who you are, and this world needs people like you! Don’t forget that!

I hope you enjoy our version of the great PINK song: That’s All I Know So Far

This is all I know so far, and I look forward to the learning! Be well beautiful friends! Thank you for your love, support & kindness! Find the Good! Leave the rest!

Finding the Good! A weird gift I have is finding 4 leave clovers…strangest thing. Almost as weird as my goat impression! LOL!

Niccole

More good! Just for fun, my brother’s new wiener dogs! Missy and Max! So cute!

Beating the Heat on our OR tour!

Any time Juno can swim, it’s a GREAT day!!!!

It was 102 degrees as we made our way across the hot desert on Fourth of July.  Fortunately we were headed west towards the Oregon coast where it was 10 degrees cooler.  We landed at McMenamins Edgefield (https://www.mcmenamins.com/edgefield) in Troutdale for a wedding we were playing.  It was a fabulous old hotel (built in 1911 for the “down and out”) that today, is like a carnival for adults!  They have a 3 par golf course;  big scale concerts at their amphitheatre with artists like Steve Miller and Michael Franti; beautiful gardens and landscapes everywhere;  three restaurants and a movie theater on site; and don’t forget “Ruby’s Spa;” a unique winding, circular hot pool with beautiful foliage everywhere, providing privacy for guests around every corner.  And you can order a cocktail or beverage anywhere you go, and carry it wherever you’d like.  Folks at all hours of the day and night were headed down in their bathrobes, drink in hand, smiles on their faces, taking the hobbit trail down to the spa for a relaxing soak.  It was a fabulous experience!

Nicc walking down the hobbit trail.

The wedding the next day was lovely, but also an under-taking, as most weddings are.  It took place on the grounds at the picturesque Admin House with lush gardens and thankfully some shade.  The entire wedding event happened at this location which was good! Load in at 2pm, and load out at 10pm was a challenge and made for a long day.  It’s one thing for a full band to provide 5 hours of music, but a duo?  Plus they all wanted to dance before dinner, so we were pullin’ out our big gun’s right up front!  Rockin’ and rollin’ in 94 degree heat!  We both have the blisters to prove it (on our fingers, not our feet thankfully), but  Nicc definitely strained her voice which was a total bummer.  Sometimes it’s an occupational hazard.

We loved seeing all the dads dance with their daughters, twirling them around, and doting on them; connections evolving with smiles and laughter right before our eyes.  “Life is Beautiful” indeed! Those little girls will likely have precious lasting memories of that day…..we, on the other hand were over-heated and exhausted, slathering arnica gel on our feet and sore shoulders back at the hotel room, tending to the doggie, Juno who patiently sat in the room 6 hours while we entertained.  Weddings are a particular challenge in that you are “holding the energy and vibe” for the entire evening. Lots all happening behind the scenes to make the wedding happen, but the music for the evening is what ensnares everyone. The joy is contagious! How wonderful!

The lovely newly-weds were super happy, and we exchanged a heart-felt hug the next day before departing to Lincoln City, Oregon to see our friends, Jen and Mary.  We had some QT with those girls, and a place to thankfully hang our hat for a few days.  We got to visit our favorite spots like Pacific City, had long walks on the beach with Juno, and the Inn at the Spanish Head offered its usual great views and yummy appetizers!

We happened to pull off just past Whale’s Cove at a rest stop, quite happen stance along the way as Juno needed to pee, and low and behold, there was a beautiful gray whale making its way up the coast line, spouting air from its spout every 2-3 minutes. It was magical!  So random, and yet so destined to be seen by our eyes! What a delight!

We headed to Florence, OR. to visit my long time friend from childhood, Annette and her partner, Torsten.  They had recently purchased a beautiful home near the Sand Dunes (where they like to play on their dune buggies). It sat on a pristine lake, so serene and peaceful, but with the dune buggies revving their happy engines in the background.  She loves it! It’s her passion. (She knows revving engines means somebody’s having a really good time!)

Her two dachshunds were not as socialized as Juno and she had forewarned us, but we were clearly not really prepared for what was in store. There were many time out sessions and not much relaxation had by all, but we eventually got it figured out just before we left.  I’m sure it will be a repeat performance next time we return. Needless-to-say, it was a lovely visit that I wouldn’t trade for anything! So good to catch up!

We headed for Bend early Saturday morning, as we had a 5 hour drive ahead of us, and were scheduled to play 5-8 pm, with sound check at 4pm.  Meghan Kelly Watters and her wife, Lindsay fortunately made the long trek there to meet us with her fabulous, groovin’ drum kit and we had a fantastic set there!  We were on the lake with a nice breeze, but to be fair, it was 97 degrees in the mountains, and we were frying our asses off!!  Nicc was in the sun for a full set poor thing. It was “NO BEUNO!” Meg saved the day and arranged for a place for us all to stay that evening!

We had breakfast the next morn with our buddy, and former drummer, Scott Lindbloom and his wife, Katherine.  We were the first guests they’ve had at their place since the Covid shut down.  They served an amazing gourmet meal  we enjoyed on their back patio, and it was so nice to catch up and enjoy Scott’s wonderful sense of humor again.  Love him like a brother! 

We drove 1,300 miles in a week, 25 hours total, and came home to a few big caliber shows 3 days upon our return.  Needless-to-say, we were very wary from not only the road (body is still vibrating) but the intense heat and smoke from all the fires, both in Oregon and in Idaho.  Singing a three hour set in hot, smoky weather was very difficult.  We both had sore throats after the show, and have been babying our voices upon our return home. Plus eating on the road for a week poses its own challenges…..we are, indeed what we eat!

We’ve had 14 shows this month, mostly in the hot heat, but ya’ll have “Showed up for the show” with waggy tails and smiles that we carry in our pockets each and every day!!!  Thank you all for your incredible support, we are so grateful!

We will be traveling abroad in WA.  and ID. most of August………we plan to do our next love stream on Thursday August 19th!  We do apologize for missing the first Thursday of the month for our next stream.  We’ll be up in the mountains of Stanley, ID performing where there is little to no cell reception!  But hope you’ll tune in August 19th for a fun-filled show from our home to yours!  We so appreciate you and look forward to seeing you in person or at our next stream. Cheers, cheers, cheers my friends!  So grateful for all of your support!  Hope you’re having a fantastic summer!

Take the best of care now, and do ‘all the things that you love!’

Love Mo and Niccole

And sometimes…Juno drops the ball to see Nic’s retrieving skills! :-)

Wyoming/Montana Tour

Long Horns at the Grand Tetons.

Hey friends!

It’s Mo Mo!  I journaled our most recent trip and would like to share it with you!  Hope you have a couple of moments to venture out to the Old West with us! The Jackson,Wyoming/Billings,Montana trip showed up as quickly as we expected….but the silver lining was, we were anticipating the 11 day tour, and planned accordingly.  The entire week prior to departure, we pulled out the check list, and checked it twice!  If you get to do 5-6 things on the list before it’s 100 degrees outside then you’ve had a good day!  What’s cool about this process is that it makes everything relatively stress free.  You get a chance to be mindful of where you’ve put everything, and try to be as streamline as possible.  Knowing where everything is for easy access is essential on the road, and being able to see 6 inches out the rear view window over the pile of equipment and daily essentials…. well now, that’s a good day! Also trying to remember the “perfect jenga” in which to re-pack it all each time is another art that requires constant perfecting.

We traveled 6 ½ hours across the Idaho plains, plateaus, and lava fields, landing in Kelly, Wyoming on Tuesday, June 8th.  Love the 80 mph speed limit on Highway 84!  We had the glorious offer to stay at our friend Pam’s cabin, on their steer ranch, and we were so grateful to have such a lovely respite to hang our hats!  Mice and all!  When we arrived, the cabin was aglow from the soft light of a beautiful stained glass lamp propped in the window, welcoming us in for what would be a most memorable time.  

This land used to be the grounds of the Teton Valley Ranch Camp where Niccole was not only a camper from age 12 to 15, but was also a counselor and trail cook for many years, leading pack rides, and teaching girls how to “hold their own” in the wilderness.  It’s safe to say “she was a bad-ass.”  I have total respect.  It was wonderful to hear her and Pam’s adventurous stories about growing up together at camp; Pam, who’d she’d known since she was 13 years old.  So many memories, and it was fantastic to get a window in to their incredible experiences together.  What a bond they share that’s akin to family, like a sister.

Artist Cabin at Teton Valley Ranch.

The small cabin we stayed in had an owl high above the tree tops, lots of hummingbirds and bumble bees; a red-tail hawk would make its presence known among the swaying aspen groves, and a doe that came to feed on the rich grasses out front, nourishing and awaiting the birth of her soon to be baby fawn. The Grand Teton (almost 14,000 feet) towered high in the sky on the horizon, it’s appearance changing momentarily given it had its own weather pattern.  The sunsets were remarkable! So incredibly peaceful.

Highlights on the ranch were riding the 4 wheel ATV’s out to reinforce the fences before we let the mama steers and baby calves out to pasture.  The glorious Teton Mountain range was in the near distance.  We loved feeding the giant steer, Sherman, who was the father of all the babies. It was a challenge to not get gauched by its 5 foot horns.  He was beautiful!

There was a fabulous view of the Tetons from Dornan’s at Moose Junction. We frequented there for libations, pizza and lively conversation with the locals. We did a little hiking in the park and visited its pristine lakes; one day in particular was stormy, cloudy, and magnificent!   We got the pleasure to see a bit of the “Hootananie” open mic night watching some local performers sing their hearts out to an incredibly loving and supportive audience.  That was really cool! 

On top of the world!

I’d never been up the tram or gondola at Teton Village/Jackson Hole Ski Resort, so Nicci took me up the gondola one afternoon, and the views were spectacular! There were lots of folks taking the chair up with their mountain bikes, and riding back down. Looked like a great single track trail! We’ll put that on our bucket list for next time….don’t worry, we’ll wear all the protective gear!  

Great view of the Tetons, the boys…and extra bonus!!!

We met two lovely, hard-working local men while at Dornan’s who bellied up to the bar for a drink.  Their names, Jeremy and Sean, and we all hit it off right away, like we’d been friends since we were “knee high to a grasshopper!” We  nicknamed them “Bo and Luke Duke” from “The Duke’s of Hazard,” because of their lively and excited blue eyes.  We’d actually been to a lot of the same places in the Northwest so we had a lot to talk about. Jeremy looked like a cross between Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise, and Sean looked like a surfer dude from California, also with bright blue eyes.  We were up front with them about being a couple, which took all the weird “hit on games” out of the equation. It was refreshing. I’m sure we’ll see them again sometime in the future.

At the Westside Yard with Juno, our SHOW dog!!!

We got to play in Victor, Idaho at the West Side Yard on Wed. June 9th. Rennie, the manager was incredibly accommodating, and had such a positive attitude. He booked us without hesitation 4 months ago when I reached out. Even though he hadn’t seen us perform, the former manager had put in a good word for us, so we not only got booked Wednesday, but also the following Friday, upon our return from Billings, MT.  There was so much love in the audience and from the staff alike.  And because  we didn’t use our full bar/dinner tab, he gave us a $50 bump in pay!  That rarely happens!  We were so grateful, and looked forward to our next show where we were hoping to see some of Nicc’s camp friends.

If you ever visit Jackson in the summer, give yourself enough drive time to get to your destination….holy cow!  It takes 30-40 minutes to get anywhere on average, and pray for a ‘parking Angel’ when you arrive. We left Kelly Wyoming at 3:30pm on gig day, took a short cut, and still didn’t get over the Teton Pass till 5:15pm.  I’ve never seen bumper to bumper traffic over the pass, but then again, we usually visit and play in the winter when there are fewer tourists.  Lots of deep breaths.  Many lessons of patience.

Another point to consider, because you’re at 6,000+ feet most of the time and the air is super dry, you have to hydrate yourself like it’s a full time job!  No seriously, there are not enough electrolytes in the world to keep you from feeling heat exhaustion and a bit of high altitude sickness no matter how much you prepare.  And because Niccole and I have experienced severe heat exhaustion multiple times over our 17 year “musical magic carpet ride journey” (I blame it on all those gigs in 109 degree heat), we are sometimes like wilted flowers on a hot day.  Like, oh shit, I need a nap, kind of feeling. Unfortunately you can’t cool yourself off with water misters or any kind of precipitation when you play or there’s a good likelihood you’ll electrocute yourself.  Occupational hazard.

Thursday, June 10th we made tracks to Billings, MT. via Cody and the East gate of Yellowstone Park. The topography was drop dead gorgeous!!  It took your breath away.  Giant hoodoos like you see in Brice Canyon National Park towered over us and we made our way through the canyon.  We landed in the historic district on Billings off of 12th Ave North.  It was a charming little place called the “Sunshine House,” actually owned by a gal who was also a musician. You could tell she was artistic given the way the house was laid out and decorated. It was like a quaint, comfy house in the North End of Boise; you immediately felt at home, floor creeks, eccentricities and all. Juno felt right at home which was a bonus since we were gone 6-7 hours at a time during our Sat/Sun gigs there.  She’s a “burb dog!”  Loves the suburbs, like where we live. That’s what she’s used to.

Meghan Kelly Watters, our drummer, her wife, Lindsey, and our dear friend, Debbie Sagar, who was turning 60 that week, and had never been to Jackson Hole or Yellowstone, came along for the ride. We were so cozy in our Airbnb!  They gambled, and won a bunch of cash, bonus!  We landed in a bar that had only 2 people in it, so we sang Pink’s “That’s All I Know So Far,” at the top of our lungs after our Sunday night gig, over a few shots, Deb pulling out her egg shaker, and Meg playing drums on the table.  Man, that was a fun, “never to forget” time.  I re-play all the memories in my mind often and it makes me smile.  Having these girls along for the ride made the gigs in 100+ heat so much more enjoyable! We could all suffer together, and really “brought the energy” as best we could despite the environmental factors.

Of course, our lead guitarist, Bonnie Johnson, who now lives in Billings with her girlfriend, Pam joined us on both shows!  One show for her gf’s 30 Anniversary of owning and successfully running “Plaza Fitness,” in which all proceeds went towards the Special Olympics.  And Sunday was for our dear friend, Lydia whose husband turned 64.  We played on a flat bed truck in a giant covered horse arena with a sandy floor.  Both shows were exceptionally fun, and a good time was had by all!!!! Hooray! 

The girls stayed in Billings for another day so Lindsey could do some work for corporate there. She works for the same Engineering Company in Boise, and it was good for her to rub elbows with the boss of all bosses.  Then extra bonus, the girls came through the Eastern gate of Yellowstone on Tuesday, joining us at the cabin back in Kelly WY that evening.  We took them to Dornan’s for dinner so they could take in the stunning views of the Teton Mountain Range, then went in to town to visit the Cowboy Bar for a shot or two. The place was packed on a Tuesday night, and their eyes popped out as they were suddenly inundated with the over the top sound of 300 people “all having a great time,” and yelling it at the top of their lungs.  Good times!  Never to forget as we sat on the historic bar stool saddles.

Deb Sager, Nicc, Mo, Lindsay, Meghan…breathing in a good time!

The girls got to experience a bit of the ranch life. Fed Sherman, the big steer, saw the baby calves and mama steers, and met our good friend Pam.  They headed out Wednesday morn, and we held down the fort for another 3 days until our next gig Friday back at Victor’s West Side Yard. 

Sally Cow! The most friendliest Long Horn! But…still long horn, so watch it!!!

It was nice to have QT with our friends, and take in all the beauty without “having to be someplace, and on to the next destination right away.”  Friday’s show brought out all the Teton Valley Campies, and we found ourselves playing lots of originals that they were requesting, like the Sun Runs, Sweet Wyoming, Despite the Dents, and a new cover by Kenny Chesney called “A Better Boat.”  It was nice to witness the incredible reunion happening as we sang to them.  Some hadn’t seen each other for 5+ years.  Lots to catch up on indeed! So cool!

Saturday morning came 6/19, and we endeavored to re-contain the week’s worth of sprallage , re-packing the cab of the truck with some semblance of order.  We had a local show to do early the next day so we had to make tracks! The hornets, black flies, and mosquitoes were unfortunately very active while we were packing in the early 90 degree mountain heat, which would have been a very funny video experience if I wasn’t so irritated. But you’d just hear cussing the whole time.  Plus we did lots of cabin cleaning, always very important to leave your most gracious accommodations as good as, if not better then when you found it.  We took all the recycling, and garbage out (because of bears and mice), and left it shiny as new.  That way you always get invited back!

The long 7 hour drive home across the hot dessert left a lot to be desired, but we were excited to get home and beat the heat.  We were so grateful for all the incredible experiences we’d had on this trip.  We can only hope that we leave a lasting impression of joy and hope that lingers long after we’ve shared our tunes with them.  11 days, 1,754 miles and 40 hours of driving time total for this tour.  You were in our thoughts along the way!  As you are when we learn or write a new song.  You are the inspiration, and what keeps us truckin’ along!

We treasure the privilege of being able to play music for folks and lift them up.  We couldn’t be on this musical journey without all of you.   Hope your summer travels are full of “Happy Trails!” Cheers my friends!

Take the best of care now!

Love Always,   Mo, Nicc, and Juno

View of the Grand Teton during sunset out the cabin window.

Through the Fear and into Trust!

This pic was taken “Somewhere” ha, that’s the name of the venue. Janet Wilson took this pic and I love it, she caught us! That was a very rocking show with Meghan Kelly Watters and Rochelle Smith! Thanks Janet!

Hi Friends! 

I hope this finds you well!  May was a month of pushing outside the barriers of my comfort zone for sure and breaking through fears.  

I had the fortunate opportunity to ride my motorcycle with a group called BACA, “Bikers against Child Abuse”.  My “big-little brother” Jeremy is a sweet friend (and guitar student) who belongs to this group and invited me and another friend to join.  

Though it scared me, as I have never ridden bikes with more than 10 people and it was for 100 miles, I had a conversation with myself about it and committed, even though it made me feel a bit uneasy.  I was worried about people being too close in proximity and not sure of it all.  But one thing that kept me in it was the fact that I KNOW riding motorcycles makes me feel alive inside!  

Sure, it’s a scary contraption, a death mobile for some…or worse…a mamer of life.  There are worse things than death! Being incapacitated scares me more than death.  I can handle the “other side”.  There is a deep inner-knowing that I’ve been over there before, ha ha…but to be injured in life to a degree that would cause you to lose all that you love to do…would truly crumble this world of mine, yet I suppose I would bloom from those ashes as I have in previous “deaths” of this life.  I have experienced many lives and many deaths in this lifetime to become who I am.  

The only selfie on our ride. Kristie and I having a wonderful day, we were bundled as it was chilly in the morning. Nice helmet hair!!!

 As we rode it was invigorating!  I was in LOVE with the country side that surrounded our Treasure Valley.  The cows, sheep and horses that we passed and the sound of over 100 motorcycles as they buzzed like bees filled me with adrenaline in such a euphoric way!  It was amazing! The smells and the wind on my face (I am a helmet wearer- just so you know!)  A patch on a fellow riders jacket read: “Death doesn’t scare me…not living does!”  Freaking summed up my thoughts right there!  I have been a risk taker in my life time, and in doing so…whew…I have certainly been burned yet I have also attained certain degrees of living that I would NEVER trade.  I’m sure many of you identify with this as you peel back your own stories and traverse along your own path ways of your life. 

 So, I did it…and LIVED, and it was joyous, exciting, new and different!  And it was for a VERY good cause!  We raised money for a great organization, met people, pushed beyond our fears and came out the other side.  Check that off!  

I was completely exhausted after the ride and we had a private party to be at 5:00pm that same night!  I had just enough time for a 45 minute nap when I got home.  We rode 100 miles in decent weather, but you spend a lot of time focusing and that can make one weary.   

I conked out for an hour!  I could barely drag myself out of bed.  As I was completely exhausted getting dressed I wondered how in the HELL I was going to pull off this evening!  OMG!  I knew when we booked this party after the ride; I was going to be in for it. But I accepted my fate in it all haha!  

 Here’s what happened…I zombied into the party trying to be as “up” as I could muster.  I really don’t think anyone but Mo noticed.  We hauled our equipment under a tent that was set up for us in a beautiful back yard setting.  I thought hopefully, “Oh, we’ll be back ground music”…NOPE!  They all snuggled down in front WAITING to be entertained! And what was more unnerving, there were SEVERAL musicians observing us!  Oh God help me!  Ha!   

 Playing in front of other musicians is always quite demanding because they are the toughest of all audiences.  They can tend to be the most critical and opinionated, watching your hands and comparing your versions of songs! It can be dreadful!  

 The perfect thing though, I was too tired to care!  My how I have grown! “Not caring” allows me freedom to just be me and not put my brain into someone else’s head.  I can just be me and if they don’t like it or have a negative judgment; it is clearly their problem.  This has taken me YEARS of perfecting! So much energy can go to waste when we try to please others or prove ourselves.  Sure, can I still fall in that trap? Absolutely!  But I notice more and more my own freedom song of simply doing the best I can do and having that be enough.   

Of course years of therapy has probably helped this situation ha ha!  But years of playing in front of all sorts of audiences, critical to accepting, has really shaved the edges off and has allowed us to CLAIM ourselves simply as we are!   

 And because we did this…the show was a smash!  I got my second wind 2nd song in and was on on on!  I told stories and had lots of humor and did a great job with the song selections and all the musicians came up and were super positive. Hallelujah!  Sometimes the magic of music does it and we come along for the ride as long as we open ourselves to just doing the best we can and not expecting too much.   

 A classic example…I’m really into the musician P!nk  (Pink) right now.  We got the chance to watch her documentary and Holy Wowsa!  Talk about an authentic wonder!  She is a sensation!  Truly!  It’s a must watch for those who can appreciate a woman rock-star mom!  Flying through the air with the greatest of ease, singing at the top of her lungs and BRINING IT to every show!  She makes me proud just watching her.  Also relieved I don’t have to do all that shit! Ha ha ha!  OMG!  Truly! I can’t say enough about how much I admire her Spirit, strength, voice, fortitude, genuineness!  She is the stuff of REAL and I love seeing women in music thrive and excel!  Check it out if you haven’t.  (I believe it’s on Amazon Prime.)  

 Another step out of the box was talking for mother’s day at CSL.  Rev. Jackie contacted me 3 days before that Sunday service and asked if I would speak.  I thought she was joking! Was there an emergency?  Nope.  She just thought it was time for me to talk again.  I thought about it.  There were a thousand things I could share since my Mama was such an amazing influence on my life.  I said yes because I would NOT have been proud of myself if I declined.  I stepped up; even though we had 3 shows and a bazillion other things going on I decided it was best I do it!  I also made it light.  I decided I didn’t want it to be stressful and it wasn’t!  It was pure joy and also a push out of my comfort zone.  I was happy and grateful to do it as it put me in touch with my beloved Mama’s energy!   

 You can view/listen to the talk here:

 https://www.facebook.com/watch/live/?v=4010569402390066&ref=search

 Lastly, trusting our builders to do our van job and do it correctly with our hard earned dollars!  Whew!  And trusting myself that we deserve these “upgrades” and they will carry us through to a greater creative space and also provide us the tools to go places with our music.   

Our beloved Van project and studio is what I’m referring to.  The Van, “Sparky”, is in production to be converted to our specifications.  It is a highly detailed project of which I feel completely over my head but I am taking it in stride.  The shop, which we are turning into a studio, will bring an ambiance of warmth and creativity! This will be place to go and write, record and gather with other song-writers and be host to some wonderful concerts in the future.  All designed to elevate our music further.  Putting all my eggs in this basket can be scary and yes, once again, out of my comfort zone.   

Ripping stuff out of Sparky!!!

The Demolition! OMG, the man who owned this before us glued and screwed and nailed and glued again! Guess he thought it was permanent…um, until I got my hands on a crow-bar! Ha!!! That was NOT an easy task!!!

Today, the sub-floor is in, the furring strips added and now starting to frame. Talking about where exactly the toilet will go! Ha!!! Imagine, a ride with a bathroom! :-) A first for us!!!

 But I look at it this way…if I were to be out of this existence this time next year…how would I prefer to have lived this year? What would I be waiting for?  Why WOULDN’T I do this, if I can swing it?  Right?!  I see how fast the years have rolled by and we are doing nothing but getting older so…call it…seizing the “youth” I still have!    

 Every time I go into doubt or think this is all way too expensive or extravagant…I come back to this “knowing-ness” that SEES a picture in my head of satisfaction. Our performing will elevate, our circle of fans and friends will widen, our song ideas and creativity will expand.  I just FEEL this and it over rides my doubt.  Believe me, I do have doubt at times…but my passion over rides these setbacks.  I wish to step into some greatness here.  On some level!  I’m reaching.  I could fall on my face, and I have been to the bottom, so…when I back up and see that, I realize that once again, I’m not afraid of death (or failure, a type of death)…I’m afraid of not living fully!   

That is my Promise to myself…and that being said…guess what your download is this month!  The great, amazing Tracey Chapman’s beautiful song, “The Promise” performed by yours truly!  That whole song is a step out of my comfort zone.   

 It utilizes my LOW voice and taps into an emotion of deep deep love.  A promise I can keep, to myself and to others, to simply show up as best I can and to press my boundaries and push beyond my fears or perceived limitations.   

 I’m a work in progress, so is Pink, aren’t we all?!  Do what you love!  A tip of the hat to our newest member Kathy!  I know you love this song, now you have it at your disposal!  Enjoy ya’ll!!! 

Much love, 

Nicc, Mo & Juno!   

www.blazeandkelly.com

"Smile is the sunshine of your soul"